All I ever wanted…

Have you seen the gorgeous Melimelo bags? There’s one that resonated with me so much. The slogan on it was ‘All I ever wanted was everything’ and I am so guilty of this. But what do you class as everything? Is anyone ever truly happy and satisfied with what they have? It’s human nature – we always want more.

When I was younger I used to think when I have the perfect house, car, clothes,figure and designer handbags coming out of my ears…that’s when i’ll have ‘made it.’ Approaching 30, renting, covering my lumps and bumps in primark leggings and barely being able to afford a gingerbread house – let alone the dream house on rightmove, I see now that that, in fact was not ‘everything.’

Seeing people I love, fighting just to stay alive, to have one more sniff of a loved ones head. To get oxygen into their lungs. To hear I love you one more time. You realise that however lovely it would be to have the materialistic items – none of it means anything really. You wont want to hug your designer shoes when the end comes, you wont be flicking through photo albums of your top spec cars, reminiscing about how much money you’ve spent over the years. It will be the people that you shared your life with, the ones you gave life too and the friends along the way…that’s who you’ll want there, that is what matters. Money may be able to buy you a certain amount of happiness but it cant buy you life.

I am very lucky to have been able to of had two beautiful children that I love with every atom of my being, I have a wonderful partner, mother, siblings and friends. My children have their health and I have mine to be able to look after them and watch them grow – and that, to me…is in fact – MY EVERYTHING.

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Grey is not okay!…

So Halloween came a few days early for me when my hairdresser of many years said those words women around the globe dread to hear…’Oh look, it’s your first grey hair.’ Panic stirred inside me & I started having a ‘late twenties’ crisis (I hate to think what my mid life one will be like haha!) What have I achieved? Where is my life going? Will I ever meet the one? Will I have more babies? 

It seems like everything has flown by so quickly, I can remember being at reception in school…and now I have a daughter that goes to the very same school – with some of the teachers that taught me (wonder how old that makes them feel!) I remember my 18th, my 21st and all the years inbetween like it was yesterday but it wasn’t and that scares me. I wish I could go back and savour every moment good or bad. It’s like I was born…I fast forwarded 27 years…and now I’m a grey haired (one hair…but still)  *almost 30 year old 😱 when did life pass me by. Btw I know how totally dramatic I sound but one grey hair at a time my youth is slipping further and further away – so my crisis drove me to create a tinder account (I will update you in my next post about this lol)  book in for more regular hair maintenance appointments and I brought my first ever hat 😂 I may never take it off, how did you cope when you found your first one and how old were you? I know some people don’t mind…but for me – grey is not okay haha x